Posts tagged “Emme Hall

The MegaMonkey JFF Race-a-Thon

Photo by DezertWife Photography
Photo by DezertWife Photography

Photo by DezertWife Photography

Last minute fundraising plan! The MORE Toys for Tots 200 is this weekend, December 6th. I’ve decided to drive the whole race and not do a driver swap.  Total miles for my class will be 168 miles. Thus far the longest I’ve been in the car is 140 miles, so this will be an attainable jump for me, but I’ll have a back-up driver just in case.  I mean, this is Barstow, y’all. It’s rough out there. We’ve done a lot of work on the car lately thanks to Martha Lee Motorsports, and she’s floating over whoops like never before, still…this will be a challenge. They don’t call it Gnarstow for nothing!

So, what better way to keep me motivated than to have a JFF* Race-a-Thon?! Simply select the amount you’re willing to pledge for each mile I drive. Half of everything will go to Cedars Sinai Breast Cancer Research Center, and half will go to help get my team, The Indiana Joans, to the Gazelle Rally in Morocco in 2016.

 

Want to buy a 2015 Women of Off Road Racing calendar instead? Just go here!

Seriously, how awesome is this?

Seriously, how awesome is this?

Need another calendar like you need a hole in the head? Hey, we get it! Just donate a flat amount on the Paypals!




 
 
*JFF=Just Fucking Finish


We Are On Our Way!

IMG_1518

IMG_1518

Well, Sabrina and I leave this weekend for 24th Edition of the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles, and we couldn’t have done it with out all the help of our friends, family, and partners!

Special shout out to Resqme, who came in at the last minute to help us with the truck rental. They make a fantastic handheld recovery device, with a seat belt cutter and a spring loaded hammer to shatter a window. We all hope we won’t ever need an emergency tool, but having one of these on your key chain is an easy insurance policy. www.resqme.com

howto

You can follow us in real time while we’re in Morocco! Starting next week, just go to www.aichagazellerally.com and you can find daily photos and videos, see how close we are to the checkpoint, and even send us messages! We are team 183.

Other US teams are 107 The Hoehn Sisters, 172 US Nomads, and 182 Team X-Elles.

We thank each and everyone of you who helped us get to the Gazelle Rally. We are entered in the Media Challenge, with the chance to win 15000 Euros for FORCE: Facing Our Risk of Cancer Empowered. We’ll be blogging back to www.tflcar.com as much as we can.

Again, thank you, everyone! We’ll do our best to make you proud!

press release sponsors copy

 

 


All Jacked Up at the Freedom 250

Coming through pit row.

What’s worse than one flat tire during a race?  How about three?  Or how about three flat tires AND NO JACK?!  That is what happened to us this weekend at the MORE Freedom 250.

I arrived Barstow late Friday night (side note: sometimes I feel a bit like Robby Gordon…I just fly in/fly out for races.  Good thing the team is on it!) and fell into instant sleep.  The next morning we got out to main pits, did a quick tech, grabbed our gas from F & L, and set off on a quick pre-run.  I have a bit of an advantage as my clean up driver, Mark, usually helps MORE lay out the course.  He also knows every inch of that desert like the back of his hand.  It’s kind of awesome.

Sammy the Bull from Dezert Outlaw Motorsports was pitting right next to us and wanted to pre-run the 29 mile loop with us in his class 1450 truck.  We stayed together until the Mile of Danger, which is really more like Three Miles of Danger, when Sammy had to slow down.  We stopped and waited, radio-ed back to make sure he was okay, and continued on when we heard all was good.  Mark guided me through the course.  We did a few turns twice as they were a little tricky, and got back to pits in about an hour.

An hour after that, Sammy still was not back.  Here’s why:

Yep, broke the whole damn spindle off the truck.  Needless to say, he didn’t race (or did he?) and the Lady Bri is still out there waiting for her knight in shining armor to come rescue her.  If anyone has a winch, let me know and I’ll put you in touch with The Bull.

Russin and I getting ready to do werk.

I was off the line at 4pm with the Russian in the co-dawg seat for the first time.  We picked off a competitor before race mile 2 and had the leader in our around race mile 16 or so.  We chased him for a bit until BAM!!  Flat driver’s rear tire.  We pulled over, Russian got out, and…no jack.  What the WHAT?  All I can think of is we lost it in the Mile of Danger somewhere.  It’s never really fit all that well in the car and that section was really rough.

So….what to do?  No jack, big flat tire.  Russian lifted the back end a bit and I stacked some rocks.  Then we dug under the tire but it was so rocky there we couldn’t dig deep enough.  As luck would have it (for us, anyway), Nick Tonelli picked that moment to have electrical issues (I think) about 100 yards from us.  We limped over, borrowed his jack, shared a tool, and were on our way.  All told though we lost about 20 minutes.

Lap two was clean.  Unofficial time was 48 minutes, which is an average speed of 36 mph, with a quick pit.  The good family team of Bradley Racing was there to guide us safely into pits and lend a hand.  Lap three brought another flat, again lucky for us near a chase vehicle.  Not OUR chase vehicle, mind you, just A chase vehicle.  Big thanks to team 1280 chase who jumped out of their truck, impact wrench in hand, and changed the tire for us.

Lap 4 was clean, but at this point, I was toast.  I was not feeling well.  In fact, I was pretty sure I was going to barf.  I had wanted to try to stay in the car the whole time, moving over to co-dawg for Mark for laps 5-8, but I knew I was spent.  I radio-ed back to see if  back up co-dawg Pepper, whom I knew was coming late from work, was there yet.  The answer came back negative.

I came in just before 8pm and look who was all suited up and ready to co-drive?!  None other than Sammy the Bull.  I literally fell out of the car and stumbled over to a chair, willing myself not to throw up.  Martee is always on hand with a cold bottle of water and this time was no different.  I eventually laid down on the trailer until my body stopped humming.  It took about an hour for me to feel back to normal.

pleasedontbarfpleasedontbarfpleasedontbarf

Mark and Sammy had a bit of trouble with a loose distributer cap on lap 5, but he had a fast 46 minute lap 6.  Alas, the Mile of Danger took it’s toll on lap 7, with another flat.  This time there were no strangers on whom to rely on their kindness.  Chase was called out, but by the time they got to them, we had timed out.

Official results aren’t posted yet and I’m not sure if we’ll get a DNF or just a low ranking.  I do feel very proud of myself for the clean laps I drove.  A former Gazelle told me that after going to Morocco I would be a better driver, and she was right.  I was definitely more comfortable and relaxed.  I was better at picking lines and fixing mistakes when I made them.  Was I perfect?  Oh hell no!  I picked the same damn wrong line every lap in this one section!  But, overall I felt very good.  We were on the pipe quite a lot in 4th gear and I felt very much in control of the car.  There are still times when I am cautious; downhill and sharp turns being the worst.  Much of that is seat time.  Practice practice practice!

Mark, me, and The Bull

So what’s next?  Well, I need many new tires, the transmission could be re-geared a bit, the motor has a bit less than 1000 race miles on it, and I noticed one of our limiter straps is wearing.  Plus we need new bushings, the shocks always need work, and goddamn it I want a new race suit!  I wanted to run the Chili Cook Off in September but I don’t think we’ll have the coin.  We may just squeak through Powder Puff in October and then do a complete tear down in November/December.  We’ll just have to see where the $$$ is.

Thanks to everyone who showed up to help, including Dawn and Andrew, Pepper, Jesse, Chris, Steve, Russian, Mark,  Dad, Martee, Dale, Gary, and new pals Bradley Racing, Big Sam, Pirate Hooker (I swear that’s her name!), Carly, and some guy named Rut with a great red flashy light.

And PS to all my female racers:  Check out how you can be in the 2014 Women of Off Road Racing calendar!

 


Rap Star Gazelles

It wasn’t all technical driving while on the Gazelle Rally.  There were times where we were driving on roads.  Of course, we couldn’t go faster than 50 km/hr, so we had a lot of time to kill.  Sabrina is a professional singer and I have dabbled in musical theatre, so we often sang.  We sometimes rapped.

Badly.

 

 


Rallye Aicha des No Sleep

“Bonjour Gazelles!  C’est quatre heure!”

Every day through eight days of competition a melodic French female voice called out to us and every day I wanted to yell back, “SHUT THE FUCK  UP IT’S 4AM ARE YOU CRAZY?!?!”

One of the most difficult aspects of the Gazelle Rally is the lack of sleep.  You’re up at 4am, you leave at 6am and you put in anywhere from 10 hours (if you’re a really really good team) to 16 hours (if you’re a new team like we were) in the truck.  During that time you never know what will happen.  You may dig yourself out, you may help other teams dig out.  You’ll probably be running up and down terrain, scouting it out and you might change a tire.  Or two.  .  You’re plotting points and plotting your strategy.  Mentally and physically you are spent at the end of the day.

Yes, they are heavy.

Back at the bivouac you still have to set up camp, fuel the truck, talk to the mechanics, and eat.  You may or may not have a chance to take a shower.  Mostly I did not.

Getting to bed by 10pm was a luxury.  We were usually collapsing into our tents around midnight.  Even though it was bulky and took up space in the truck, I was so happy to have my Kelty cot.  I was getting some quality 4 hours of sleep.  My fellow Gazelles with their aired up sleeping pads often did not fare so well.

This video was taken the day after the infamous Crater Road, where we traversed a giant crater in the dead of night, only to descend down Sketch Boulevard into the maze of a palm tree farm.  I still don’t know how we made it out.

 


Lesson Number 1 From the Gazelle Rally

It’s been a few weeks since I’ve been back from Morocco, and I’m still trying to process everything.  Most of me is really proud that we did it and finished and kept our ranking through the whole thing.  We finished in the top half of the First Participants Challenge and in the top ten of the Isuzu Media Challenge.  All in all we had an awesome time.

And yet….

There is a part of me that won’t shut up about the mistakes I made.   One of my goals was to take care of the truck and if you followed us at all you know that on Day 2 it all went to a bit of hell.  I came up out of a wash, hit a deep trough of some sort, and put a nice dent in the frame of our truck.  As a result we had to sign a waiver that said we understood the risks of continuing with a bent frame and that we wouldn’t drive faster than 50 km/hr.  They put an alert on our Iritrak system so that if we did it would sound an alarm back at the bivouac.

50km/hr is 30mph by the way.

I’m not sure how much this contributed to our finishing position, but I can’t help but thinking that if we could have gone faster between checkpoints we would have, well, made it to more checkpoints.

But shoulda coulda woulda, right?  The lesson to come out of this (besides the given Don’t Break the Truck) is Patience.  We were stuck with what we had.  We couldn’t go any faster, and I just had to deal with it.  This is how I did it:


Follow My Team at the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles

It’s less than TWO WEEKS until we leave for the Rallye!!!  We know a lot of you want to follow us on this crazy adventure.  We are proud to announce that we have partnered with Jalopnik as part of the Isuzu  Media Challenge.  The Media Challenge is a mini-challenge within the Rallye.  Participants must drive an Isuzu vehicle and partner with a major news outlet who will post daily updates.  The winner of this challenge gets 15000 euros for their charity of choice.

That’s right.  We don’t have to win the whole Rallye (although we wouldn’t mind doing that too), we just have to beat the other teams in the Media Challenge to win some serious coin for our charity.  We have chosen FORCE: Facing Our Risk of Cancer Empowered.  We wanted to work with them at this point as they specifically benefit women who have a hereditary risk of breast cancer, like Navigator #1 Michele Martineau.

Of course, we wouldn’t be us if we didn’t try for even MOAR press coverage.  During the Rallye, March 19-28, you can follow us at

www.jalopnik.com
www.dirtnewz.com
www.herhighway.com
www.roadfly.com
www.femaleracingnews.com

We hope you will take the time to write to us.  After March 16th just go to the Gazelle website and click on Rally Live.  There you can find a link to all the teams.  Click on us,  team 178.  Go to Write to the Gazelles and follow the instructions.  The Rallye will print out our messages for us at the bivouac each night.  We imagine this is a lot like mail call in the Army and any messages we get from our supporters will mean a lot to us.  We will try to write back but we have heard that there are only 3 computers for 300 women.  Those are not good odds.

And of course, you can track us.  Even though we won’t have GPS, we will be tracked via satellite so you can monitor our progress.  Just go to www.gazellerally.com.  We are team 178, but there are 4 other American teams to cheer for:

Team 107 Lerner/Reina; Third Time Participants
Team 136 Hamilton/Beavis; First Time Participants
Team 182 Klishevich/Chiadmi; First Time Participants
Team 185 Meddows/Barone; Second and First Time Participants

We wouldn’t be going to Morocco without the help we have received from our friends, family, and supporters.  We realize these are difficult financial times for everyone, and we thank you SO VERY MUCH for helping us get to Morocco for this crazy, life changing adventure!

 


JFF at BAP

 

We had such an awesome time at Battle at Primm this past weekend!  SNORE Racing put on such a well organized and safe event.  They had over 200 cars there but everything ran smoothly and on time, with plenty of volunteers and an awesome staff.

There were 26 cars in our class, and AAAALLLLL the big dawgs came out to play.  Many of them had their single seat 1600 cars, which probably weigh about 10 pounds over the minimum.  They all had their win faces on too.  I knew this was a place to sit back, learn, and JFF.

As we pulled into staging on Saturday, I was shaking and my stomach was in knots.  Just seeing all 26 starters there and knowing I’d be out with them on those short 13 mile loops was enough to get me super nervous.  I needn’t have worried though.  Since we were unable to attend qualifying we started in the back and I am not kidding when I tell you I saw only two cars that first day.  What I thought was going to be some kind of epic wheel to wheel experience was more like any other desert race where you often find yourself out there alone for long stretches of time.  I’m sure the guys in the front didn’t have that same experience, but for me I was rollin’ solo.

After the first day, it became obvious that the leaders had me in just flat out speed, to say nothing of drive experience.  BAP is all about fast straightaways and dangerous turns.  I’m sure I lost some time in the turns as my entrances were pretty timid (there is a limit to the whole slow in/fast out theory after all) but I was pinned in all the straights and the highest Mark saw for me on the GPS was 72 mph.  Mostly we ran those sections in the high 60s.  I am sure the other guys had at least 5-7mph on me in those straights.  It’s a combination of gearing, weight, and let’s face it, money.  I can’t afford a new engine or a complete tear down every race.  So I guess we will continue on our quest to JFF and know that we are doing the best we can with the resources and talent we have got.

Mark took over driving duties on Sunday.  Everyone turned in slightly slower lap times since the course was chewed up a bit from the day before.  The fast speed I saw for him was 75mph, but there was a wicked wind and we may have been pushed a bit! At one point on the dike jump we could both feel the wind push us as we were flying through the air…not a good feeling!

We ended up 14th out of 26 overall so that isn’t too bad. I learned about the car, I got a lot of practice in dangerous turns, and hell we even got to drift a bit in the stadium section of the course!  Next up for me is the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles in Morocco March 19-28th.  In a week or so I’ll have info about how you can follow my team as we navigate our way through the dunes using only a compass and an old map.

OMG I ALMOST FORGOT ALMOST THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED OVER THE WEEKEND! Fellow Gazelle Julie and her hubby Ben drove out from Vegas to say hi…IN A RALLY FIGHTER!!!  I was so not expecting them to show up in a freaking Rally Fighter!!!  And get this….BEN LET ME DRIVE IT!!!!!!!!  It’s way bigger than I thought it would be and feels quite ponderous.  The hydraulic steering is a bit twitchy but nice and heavy and the torque is just clean and available through a wide power band.  I drove it on the highway and off road and while I was nervous because, hello it’s not my Rally Fighter, I did go fast enough to feel confident in saying that this car is a beast!  AND Ben is hooking us up with a set of pink MaxTrax for the Gazelle Rally.  Thanks, Ben!!!

 

 

 


Battle at Primm Is Next

Hola, race fans!  We had a good time out testing this past weekend.  The Mr. Miyagi of shocks was on hand to dial in our baby.  It’s always a balancing act; a tweak done on one component effects the other and it’s all about finding that correct edge.  It’s a very tricky process and it means a lot of turning something 1/2 turn, then running up and down the test track for 2 minutes at flat out.  Then come back, turn something else 1/2 turn, back to the test track…lather rinse repeat.

Mr. Miyagi, doing work.

 

After testing we headed on over to the Slash X, or /x to those who know.  Always a great time to be had.  Sabrina, my navigator for Gazelles, was able to join us and she just fell in love with the place.   There are always motorcycles, quads, and buggies parked outside as families come out for a day of wheeling and always stop at the /x for lunch.

 

Hot damn she looks good!!

 

The next race will be Battle at Primm with SNORE Racing, Feb 22-24.  Truth be told I’m scared shitless.  There are at least 30 1600 cars entered (we’ll be running #1611 as our number has already been taken) and ALL the big dawgs will be there.  The format is 2 days of racing with your class, and we will do 5 laps of 13 miles each.  There will be a ton of wheel to wheel racing and I’m in my head about it a bit.  I’m always scared before a race though.  I think you’re an idiot if you’re not scared.  Hello….you could die!!  The trick is to push through that fear.

Because there are so many cars they will do qualifying runs.  I won’t be able to get there in time for that but it’s just as well.  My plan is to let the big boys battle it out and break down.  My strategy is always JFF.

Just Fucking Finish.

 


Morocco…Here We Come!!!

Well, we have paid our rally fees and we are definitely on our way to the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles!!!  Our final fundraising push is a silent auction, open until February 4th at 11pm EST.  Lots of cool stuff is up for bid including some gift cards from SDHQ Off Road, Off Road Vixens, RSK Clothing, and Mary Kay.  Plus a discounted pro entry to a MORE race, a photo package from Dezert Wife Photography, a co-driver seat in a few races with Dezert Outlaw Motorsports, and more!!  Check it out at www.32auctions.com/tcg

We are now deep in the depths of finding a rental truck…in French.   Here’s how you communicate via email to French rental companies:

1.  Frantically search the internet for “French truck rental”

2.  Realize that there are contacts listed in your Gazelle packet

3.  Feel dorky

4.  Attempt to write an email in French

5.  Proof read it with your terrible French but think, “This sounds good,” and hit send

6.  Remember something called Google Translate and run your already sent French email through

7.  Laugh at the pathetic translation and rewrite email

8.  Resend email with addendum: “Ecrit avec l’aide de Google Translate”

9.  Receive email from said French company

10. Reverse Google Translate process

 

The map has gone up, giving us plenty of time to check out the terrain via Google Earth.  It seems I owe a lot to Google Inc, lately!  At any rate, here’s a glimpse.

So we now have lots of things to take care of:  getting the necessary supplies, a new pair of boots (yes!), tools, a tent…everything we’ll need for 9 days in Morocco.  One thing we will NOT need is a navigation unit.  Remember, Gazelles navigate with a compass and an old map and nothing more.  It’s what makes the Gazelle Rally FULL OF AWESOME!!!

 

 

 

 


We Take Second at Toys For Tots

What a great way to end the season!  I got to go out to Los Angeles for 5 fun filled days of cars, complete with the LA Auto Show and a spin in the new VW Beetle Convertible.  Then I capped it off with the MORE race, where each participant brought some toys to donate to Toys For Tots.

We saw some great cars at the LA Auto Show.  My faves were the new Abarth cabrio, although to be honest I’m not sure how much of a true convertible it really is.  I adore that car and really wish it were offered in AWD and a true drop top, but if you’re down with FWD and want some fun, definitely check it out.

Interior of the 2013 Abarth Cabrio

I also got to say hi to the head of SRT, Ralph Gilles.  We talked Challenger and Viper and all things SRT.  I really like how they have brought back some great designs, but never lost the original feel.  Design evolution as opposed to revolution if you will.

I can't decide who is the best looking: Ralph, me, or the Viper.

And though I will probably never ever buy one, I was pleased to see the redesigned Honda Civic.  Everyone pretty much trashed the 2012 Civic as being, well…boring.  Honda responded quickly with a 2013 refresh that I think is quite successful, at least from the rear.

It looks good, no?

Friday I found myself driving the new Beetle Convertible. They had many different engines/transmissions to try and I got behind the wheel of the TDI manual and the turbo manual.  Both are fantastic, with the TDI offering excellent mpg and torque.

Those headlights...so Boxster-y

Along the way they had some vintage VWs for us to drive.  Honestly I was more excited about this 1979 bug than anything!  Funny but it drove just like a class 11!!

Air Cooled Love

A highlight for me was watching some journalists try to get the Beetle out of the soft sand.  They were so cute!  I was tempted to tell them to lower their tire pressure, but decided it was more fun to just sit back and watch.

ROTFLMFAO!!!

That night I hightailed it out of Los Angeles and made my way up to Barstow for the MORE Toys For Tots race.  It honestly felt a little odd; like I was just kind of dropped at the race with little prep time, which I guess is not far from the truth.  Mark and Dad had been out with the Mr. Myagi of Shocks the week before and had the car dialed in as much as they could.  The engine had been gone through down in Mexico and everything was good to go.  They had even bought gas.  It just feels odd not participating in any of the pre-race stuff.  I never pack up the truck or do any of the leg work…I really want to get back to CA.  Being this far away from everyone is killing me.  I’m just so lucky that I have good people helping me.  Very very lucky.

At tech, making sure I have all my safety equipment and that it's up to date.

At any rate, we ran a pretty smooth race.  I dropped to fourth after the first lap (hey, I didn’t pre-run…gotta take that first lap slowly) but came back to second by the end of the second lap and held it the rest of the race, thanks to co-driver Pepper keeping me at a good pace and boosting my confidence with phrases like, “That was so much better than on the last lap!!!” The format of the race was pretty cool.  We ran 6 laps of 19 miles, then 6 laps of 13 miles.  Sometime on lap two I separated the tire from the rim a bit and had a flat.  Best flat to have if you ask me, as the guys just popped it back on the wheel and it holds air just fine.  We stopped again at the end of lap 3 for one minute as the guys had missed a lug nut during the tire change.

Talent running out in 3...2....1 (don't worry. we saved it)

When I gave the car over to Mark, we were 6 minutes behind the leader and 4 minutes in front of third.  Martee hopped in as co-driver but we had a bit of a fuel spill while she was getting buckled in.  I’d like to say that making sure this won’t happen again is Priority Number One for next season.  A fuel spill is absolutely not to be tolerated.  It’s unsafe and we won’t have that.

Mark and Martee took off and put down two great laps, but the spill took it’s toll on Martee.  She was smart enough to take herself out of the car so she could get out of her suit and clean up a bit.  I was  the only one still suited up, so guess who went into the car for another 50 miles?  Yours truly. I was happy to do so, honestly, as I got to ride with Mark who has more 1600 seat time than I do.  He kept a steady pace and took us the last 4 laps and on to the podium.

Congratulating the winning team by giving them a tiny little bit of shit. Kidding! First in class Chris Fogle in #1620 could not have been nicer.

The guy who won said his team were sweating us a bit.  They found our radio channel and modified their pit schedule when they heard our chatter.  It’s nice to know I made someone worry a bit.

The whole in-car team made the local paper

So now it’s all about Morocco and raising the money to get to the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles.  It’s nine days, off road in Morocco with no GPS.  Points are awarded for shortest distance, not fastest time, making this a rally that is won by navigation and decision making rather than speed.  We need about $18,000 just to register.  You can donate via the link at the top of the sidebar.  Anything raised above and beyond our entry and rental fees will be donated to the National Breast Cancer Foundation.

And of course, don’t forget about our awesome Women of Off Road Racing 2013 calendar.  We are on our second printing so be sure to get yours NOW.  www.teamcouragegazelles.com/calendar

 


Toys For Tots

Pepper and I at tech for the Powder Puff

Looks like we’ll be out at the last MORE race of the season, the Holiday 200 on December 1.  The race will be a toy drive for Toys for Tots.  Gotta bring an unwrapped race car for a lucky kiddo!  From my understanding the race is 2 short courses of about 20 miles.  They split up the fast cars and the slow cars and you get a few hours on one course and then you switch.  I don’t know if they’ll put 1600 in the fast group or slow group.  We’re kind of slow fast cars.  At any rate, I’m so excited that Pepper Junus has agreed to co-dawg for me. She and I took 1st in class at the Powder Puff in October and we are hoping for a repeat.  Mark Burke will take over for the second course, with a super secret co-dawg. Let’s just say we are working on having the lightest passenger weight possible with his co-driver. I’ve heard Jason Coleman’s co-driver is a midget, and I aim to beat him.

And my week leading up to the race promises to be full of awesome.  I’ll be hanging out at the LA Auto Show for Roadfly.  Word on the street is Porsche will be debuting a new sports car, and since I just got out of a 911 I’m excited to see what it’s all about.  I’ll also get the chance to drive the new Beetle convertible.  But on Friday evening I have to high tail it out of LA to Barstow in time for tech.  If anyone can give me a ride let me know.

This has nothing to do with anything in this post, but I like the pic.

Remember you can still purchase our calendar, featuring some rockin’ female off road drivers.  All proceeds will go to getting us to Morocco for the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles AND help fund mammograms.  How rad is that?

 

 

 


WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER!

I can’t even begin to tell you how awesome it was to place first in class after all the bad luck and poor driving decisions I’ve made the past few months.  But it was a whirlwind weekend, let me tell you.

It started off with me not going to sleep at all on Thursday night, and getting on a 6am flight from DC to LAX.  It was just easier to not sleep.  I was lucky enough to secure a Dodge Charger SRT8 through my RoadflyTV contacts, so I had some wheels while I was out there.  Good thing too because I had to hightail it out to CBS to do a quick interview on KCAL 9, and then bust a move for tech up at Barstow.

This was a race I did as a part of Courage Girl Motorsports.  The MORE Powder Puff Race for the Cure features all female drivers and co-drivers, with all proceeds going to Cedar Sinai Breast Cancer Research Center.  Each year the race raises over $100K through team donations, a raffle, and our entry fees.  It’s one of the best races of the season and it was great to be doing it with my Courage Girls Michele, Martee, and Pepper.  You can read more about us at www.teamcourageracing.com

While at tech we talked to people, handed out calendar pre-orders (have you ordered yours?  you should), took some photos, and did a few interviews for a DVD coming out about the Powder Puff.  But really all we wanted to do was go to bed so we could get up and RACE!

The next morning Martee and Michele took off in Grace for the morning race.  Grace is emblazoned with over 400 names of breast cancer survivors, fighters, angels, and previvors.  Such a sight to see her racing across the Barstow desert.  She finished 3rd in class with an average speed of 24.7mph.

My co-dawg Pepper and I got in the car, now named Christine because she sucks you dry and tries to kill you, for the afternoon race around 11:45.  It’s always so nerve wracking to be sitting there in staging, waiting to start.  All I can think about is how much I have to pee, how my helmet is too heavy, how much I’m already sweating.  And then magically…we start and there is nothing but the road ahead and the wheel in my hands.

Pepper was fantastic in the car, calling corners and cautions, encouraging me to throttle down and pass (Trophy Trucks!  We passed Trophy Trucks and Class 1 cars!), and telling me patience when Christine’s rear end started kicking out.  And the end result?  First in class and the car was still running.  Holy crap!  And I was so close to getting a 40mph average but alas 39.5mph was all that was to be had.

So what is next?  I need to take stock of money and schedules and see if we can squeeze in one more race.  We are really focusing on raising money for the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles, a 9 day all female rally in Morocco with no GPS.  You can buy a calendar or donate at www.rally.org/teamcouragegazelles


The Hilights of the KC HiLites Race

What a great time we had this past weekend out at Lucerne Valley.  This was the first time we had the car out for a race since we got it earlier this year.  Yes we had the car out for the Mint 400, but honestly I never felt like we were truly prepared for that race (at since we only made it 36 miles, I think it’s fairly obvious that we weren’t).  This time, the car was in good shape, we had excellent pit, chase, and driver/co-driver crews, and I had a TON of moral support since all four of us from Courage Girl Motorsports were together.

Courage Girl Motorsports

Westy had also brought out some fabulous people, 2 of whom were out chasing and I didn’t even meet until after the race was done!  Keith Stewart of Pit Works and his pal Adam, Kenny the Russian, Dale the Welder, Bill and Gail, Shelly and Ryan, and awesome driver/co-dawg Mark and co-dawg Brent…everyone came out to help me get in the car and I will be forever grateful.  Dad and Dale had been working on the car everyday for weeks and basically all I had to do was show up.  I don’t know how I got so lucky!

The weekend started a little rough though.  Dad and I were holding down the pits, waiting for Dale and Westy.  Their truck wouldn’t start!  It took them a few hours to diagnose and fix the problem, and as a result we had a really late tech over at the Slash X.  But it gave Michele and I a chance to catch up with pals, so neither of us really minded.

Michele and I with Art, probably the most awesome person in desert racing.

Since this was a night race, we had until 3:30pm or so to get all the last minute stuff on the car done.  Mark and I took her out and we both thought the back end was too soft, and it was tracking right a bit.  We checked the shock pressures, looked at the tire pressures, clicked the rear torsions a few times.  It was really all we could do at that point.  It wasn’t running badly, but the back end was getting away a bit.  Had my goal been a win I would have really flipped out.  But my goal was to just get her around and not do anything stupid, as I usually am wont to do.

I had 2 really solid laps.  Not too fast, not too slow.  I met my goal for average mph.  I passed a few people.  I was passed by more.  I was focused.  I was consistent.

I was pleased.

Quick pit stop...and another click on the torsions.

I gave the car over to Mark who busted out a great 40 miles until the alternator took a huge crap.  No GPS, no radio (well we didn’t really have a radio to begin with if I’m being truthful), no lights, no power.  No go.  They were able to get another car to radio back their position, but it took chase a while to find them.  At that point they were able to switch out to a new battery to get the car to the road where Dad was waiting with the trailer.

And that was the end of the race for us.

So it sucked that we didn’t finish, but for me personally it was a victory.  It gave me more confidence behind the wheel and 146 miles of seat time in some very rough terrain.

Next will be the MORE Powder Puff on October 6th, benefiting Cedars Sinai Breast Cancer Research Center.  It’s one of the most fun races of the year, with over 200 entries and nearly 20,000 people out in the desert.  Last year the race raised over $100,000 and I hope we can raise more than that this year.  Hope to see you at tech!

Awesome livery!

 

Radio central.

 

Driver Change

 

"And then we flew through the air for like, 50 feet!!"

 

PS  On the way home Dad had a flat on the trailer, but Slime saved the day.

 


Doing It Alone Just Ain’t No Fun

Living in Washington DC and racing in California poses some shall we say, logistical nightmares.  I can usually only come out for 3 days to race, getting to actually work on the car is a luxury, and don’t even get me started on all the money I’m spending on plane fare.  Fortunately I have an awesome team that helps me out, and I wanted y’all to meet them!

First, there’s Dale.  He’s our go to guy for welding.  He’s made us a trailer (A WHOLE TRAILER!), repaired the floor pan of the 1600 car, and is making a new skid plate.  He also sometimes stores the car in his shop and his wife makes the best iced tea this side of Las Vegas.

Nickname: Moustache!

 

She's naked!

 

MA'AM's motor just waiting. Good thing we had Dale's shop to work out of

 

And what team would be complete without a logistics person?  This is actually the hardest job in racing,  as you are basically trying to predict the future while herding a bunch of unruly cats.  No…worse than that.  Unruly wild mustangs.  See racers can be like unruly wild mustangs; they are smart but damn do they want to do their own thing!  Your logistics guy has to figure out who is chasing and who is pitting, where they will be, when people are arriving, where they are sleeping, what they are eating, when you’re going through tech…I could go on and on.  And now, for this race at least, I have my very own Logistics Luminary.  And we call him westy (no capital w, he sez).

 

westy likes to look all mean and stuff.

 

westy has run logistics for the Baja 500 and 1000 as well as events stateside and he’s also a racer, so I have no problem turning everything over to him.  I know I’ll learn a lot with him running the show and if it all goes well, maybe he’ll join us permanently.  He’s bringing some awesome pit/chase people out to the race and I am so excited to meet everyone.  It always floors me when people I don’t even know step up to help me.  Sure, they are getting the thrill of being on a race crew but still.  Sometimes sitting out in the desert for hours on end waiting for the car to come through can be a nightmare.  Fortunately the car is in great shape and our goal is just to finish.  It would be great not to finish last, but honestly this is the first race with me behind the wheel of the new car AND it’s a night race.  I am doing this more for experience than anything else.  I want to drive well, not break, and finish.

So when is this next race?  I return to my native CA for the combination MORE and SNORE KC Hilites race on September 8th.  Tech is on Friday September 7th at the Slash X so if you’re around, come say hi.  I have no idea what color my hair will be, so just look for #1617!

 


Keep Them Dingo’s Rollin’!!!

What a race!  The USA 500 proved to be epic in every way!  I was driving for Desert Dingo in their class 11 bug.  To the uninitiated, that is basically a stock 1969 VW bug.  Sure there is a roll cage and the car has a bit more clearance, plus all the safety gear, but you are still running a standard 1600cc engine, drum brakes, and one shock at each corner.  No bypass, no coil overs…nada.  It’s the slowest class of off road cars and probably the roughest (although the class 9 cars are pretty bad too), but just because it’s slow doesn’t mean you can’t get into trouble.  As I found out.

I was scheduled to drive the second lap of the day.  Crusty, yes that’s what we call him, and Ryan were in the car first.  They turned in a pretty good lap time.  Crusty told me, “Course is great!  Car is working!  Go for it!”  Newbie co-dawg Toby and I got in the car and well…we went for it.

Crusty before the race. Photo by Josh McGuckin

We took off and the first thing I noticed was all the play in the steering wheel.  It had been a year since I had driven 1107, and had forgotten about this trait.  But I didn’t have time to think too much because oh my stars what is that up ahead?  It was competition!  1142 was just a quarter mile away!  What could be the best choice to make at this moment?  Should I settle down and reacquaint myself with the car or should I try to pass?

I chose poorly.

Oh my.  Look at that.  On our side.  We had been having radio troubles all day but were able to call and text back to pits for some help.  Toby and I were there for a good 1.5 or 2 hours before truck 707 came by and yanked us right side again.  By then the cavalry had arrived in the form of the boys from Project Baja, so they helped us check everything out and we were on our way.

Co-Driver Toby scouting out the scene.

For about 2 minutes.  Because I rolled the car.  Again.  Listen, I can’t make this stuff up people.  I was not able to compensate for the steering and I over-corrected.  Fortunately our chase was still close by and they came back to give us a hand.  I should have in car video of that soon.

I want to give you a little insight into the Project Baja boys.  They are sarcastic.  They like to dish it out.  They loooove pushing your buttons.  But every single one of them gave me encouraging words.  They did not make fun and they did not laugh, and for that I am immensely grateful.

I’m sure that will last until they read this post.  Then there will be  no mercy.

Needless to say I slowed it way down.  We got going and were doing fine.  Not fast, but fine.  And then we got to The Hill.  Never in my life had I seen such a hill.  And we never saw the top of it, but not for lack of trying.  We climbed that thing 5 times and got to the same spot each time, just 10-12 feet from the top.  Toby was out there moving rocks around, we got the carpets out for traction, nothing mattered.  First we backed up from the hill a bit, then a toss, then by a lot, then by about 1/4 of a mile.  I approached that thing flat out in 2nd gear, then downshifted into first and kept it pinned.  Wasn’t going to happen.  What the hell?  We had to get up it!  We had no radio  communication so we were on our own.  We backed up one last time.  1/3 of a mile, when we noticed a trail going off the the left.  We hadn’t seen it before because we hadn’t ever backed up this far, and the course is the only thing marked on the GPS.  Toby and I looked at each other.  He said, “Should we take it?”  I said, “Hell yeah!”  It dumped us out on to a public grated dirt road for about 1/4 mile, until it crossed the track again.  There was an official there who said it was okay we cut the course, that a lot of the class 11 and 9s had done it.  And he warned us about the next hill.  “It’s pretty bad but we’ll look for you.  If we see that you don’t make it, Big Chad here will tow you up.”  Big Chad nodded his agreement.

A mile later we saw it.  I approached flat out in second, tried to downshift into first, and it was like slamming the gearshift into a brick wall.  We had nothing.  Well, we had reverse.  Oh, and it wouldn’t turn over either.  We backed down and waited for Big Chad.  At this point our GoPro had run out of juice and it’s too bad because that Chevy pickup of his towed dead weight of 2200 pounds up this hill that was soft and at least a 10% grade.

At the top we bump started 1107 and were off.  It was all flat or downhill from there into the next pits.  And by downhill I mean sudden drop offs of, oh three stories or so.  But all we had was second gear.  So on a road that should have allowed for flat out, I was stuck at 35-40mph.

We limped into pits and after a going over by the guys at ProPits, car owner Jim decided it wasn’t worth fixing and we were done.  Far be it from me to argue, since I had just rolled the car twice and burned the clutch up trying to get up that hill.  Chase was called in from the other pit and I thought we done.  Until Dave.

Crusty and Dave. Photo by Josh McGuckin

Dave came in from the other pit and gave what can only be called The Motivational Speech of the Century.  He convinced Jim that we could still get the car back out there and earn some season points.  We had plenty of people to make it happen and we all wanted to do it, and I can’t tell you how awesome it was to hear Jim say, “Okay go for it.”  We descended on 1107 like flies.  Crusty and the ProPit guys started pulling the motor.  Dave started welding where the A pillar had broken, and Project Baja was on the lights.  I helped where I could, handing tools, holding things in place, and flipping switches when asked.  It’s very frustrating to me to not have the knowledge to help in these kinds of triage situations, but I am educating myself as much as I can.

Dave suited up to drive and Toby went with him.  They took off…and went the wrong way.  They missed the right turn out of pits to take the loop and instead headed towards the finish line.  We were still having radio trouble so I immediately started texting Toby, “Come back!  You missed the right hander!”  Their lights disappeared over the hill and we all knew if they didn’t figure it out they would add 70 miles that we could not afford to add.  But then…Lights cresting the hill!  They figured it out!  Hooray!  They came back towards pits, took the turn and were off for real!

Now I can’t say for sure what happened while those two were out there.  They told me at one point they lost all lights (but were able to get the HIDs back but one was pointed off to the side), they lost dash lights and the GPS, the weld broke on the A pillar and the metal sun visor came loose.  They also lost the alternator for a bit, but got it back and crossed the finish line at 4:07am.

This made for quite the rattle-y ride, I'm sure.

Unfortunately 1107 was DNF, as we only did 2 laps, instead of 3, but we were able to earn some points for the season.  And I learned a few things:  I need to keep my cool when I first get in the car.  2.  Look for a work around when in class 11.  and C:  People will rally when you ask them to.

The story doesn’t end there, though.  Crusty blew a tire while hauling 1107 home on his 1951 Chevy flatbed.  He’s fine but the truck lost two tires and a fender and 1107 hit the median and busted the driver’s side trailing arm.

We call it the Rat Rod.


This is a Test of the Emergency Wheel Travel System

Well, okay not really, but a week or so ago I met Dad up in the high desert for a little bit of seat time in the car that may just turn out to be known as MA’AM (Mean Ass Angry Monkey.  Either that or Rooster.  What do you think?)  Up until this point I’d had a total of 7 minutes drive time in her, and 36 miles of co-driving.

Thursday started off toasty and windy!  We settled in at Stoddard Valley and found a few other people out testing as well, most notably COPS Racing.  I wish I could have gotten a picture but their damn Trophy Truck went by so fast I was lucky I had enough time to jump behind a bush so as not to get *totally* dusted out.

We were finally able to break out our care package from Slime.  They sent us a healthy supply of tire sealant, tire pressure gauges, a few plug kits, and a much needed portable tire inflator that connects right to the battery.  Our old one was…well…old.  This one by Slime is super fast and much quieter.

Dad using the new 2x Tire Inflator from Slime

I spent the first day just getting a feel for the car.  It’s similar in width to the baja, but the wheel base is much longer, so it’s a totally different ride.  It has a puck clutch, which is either engaged or not (read: it’s kind of easy to stall).  The transmission, however, shifts much smoother than the baja, which I always had to force into 2nd gear a bit.  The front end behaves differently and  there are bypass shocks and a little bit more travel all the way around.  The baja runs a 2180cc motor whereas MA’AM sports the stock 1600cc.  However, she’s much lighter.   How much lighter I’m not sure since she hasn’t been on the scale, but I can definitely feel it.  I keep telling people that any co-driver will have to be 170 pounds or less so we can keep total passenger weight down to 300 pounds or less.  I’m not really joking.

Play car vs Race car

Unfortunately, something was keeping my baby down.  She was sputtering like Tom Cruise does when reporters ask him if he’s gay.  It was most pronounced at the lower rpm range, like when starting out or turning around, but sometimes when going uphill, even if the revs were still high.  Hmmmm….a carburetor issue of some sort.  We were meeting fellow Courage Girl Motorsports team members Pepper and Martee that night for dinner, so Pep stopped off at Mohr Performance and picked up a fuel filter, new jet,  and a carb rebuild kit.

You know how if you live in a small town you run into people at the best and/or worst times?  That night at dinner was one of the best times.  Martee was telling me about her secret weapon when it comes to shock tuning, the Mr. Miyagi of Shocks, if you will.  Well we walked into Chili’s and who is having a beer at the bar?  Monsieur Miyagi!  It was agreed upon by all parties present that we should meet the next morning for a little go around.  Of course, that night we still had to address the carb issues.  I changed the fuel filter and helped the guys take off the carb.  They went to work rebuilding it while Pep, Martee, and I ran out for supplies…namely zip ties and beer.

Next morning bright and early we were at it again.  But still with the sputtering!  The carb was totally clean, we had a new jet, new fuel filter.  We decided it was the float.  I can’t tell you yet if we were right, but the engine is currently at Major Performance getting a going through.  But I digress.  Mr. Miyagi (I would like to note that Mr. Miyagi is neither a karate master nor is he Japanese.  I just like calling him that because he is a miracle worker and the Annie Sullivan of Shocks doesn’t sounds as good.) met us out in Stoddard Valley and the testing began.

We got in the car and he told me, “When I tell you to get on the pipe, you get on the pipe!”  Uh..sir, yessir!  Most of the session was him and I in the car for a run, him yelling at me, “ON IT! ON IT! ON IT!  NO LIFTING!” and me thinking, “This guy is going to kill me today.”  Then he’d be out of the car, adjusting things which I don’t even pretend to understand, then back in for another run.  And I could tell with each run that something was different.  And holy crap I could go faster!  A lot faster!  Now he’s telling me to stand on the throttle and I have all kinds of confidence!  Taking the whoops in the baja at those speeds would mean my back end would get away from me.  Now MA’AM leads with her nose BAM BAM BAM right over the whoops and the back end just follows, easy peasy.  Of course, we didn’t get a super accurate tuning since the engine was not running at full potential, but it was a good start.  Once we get the car back together we’ll go out again and fine tune.


So what is next?  We will be running the MORE/SNORE combined KC-Hilites race in September, where I hope to have a fundraiser for Gazelles.  We are also running the Powder Puff in October of course.  That race will mean a lot as it raises money for Cedar Sinai Breast Cancer Research Center, and it will also be the Revenge Race for Grace, the official truck of Courage Girl Motorsports.  Her front driver’s wheel has fallen off two years in a row and we are really hoping that doesn’t happen again.  Pepper and Martee will be in Grace, and I will be in MA’AM for that one.  I’m also working on an awesome calendar of bad ass female off road drivers.  More info on that as it becomes available!

Next week I’ll be part of the drive team for Desert Dingo in their class 11 at  the VORRA USA 500 out near Reno.  Tech is on Friday July 14th, so come on down and say hi if you’re in the neighborhood.  If not I’ll be tweeting as much as I can @MMMotorsports and using #USA500.

This is what 1107 looked like after the USA 500 last year.

 

 

 


What the Hell Happened to the Hall???

Editor’s Note:  I was recently informed that I may not use the phrase “H@ll Ass Racing” in any post or in any announcement about my name change to Mega Monkey Motorsports™.  It seems a little overkill to me but frankly, I can’t afford to be sued.  Thank you to all my fans who have been so supportive through this transition time.  I hope this is the last change I will have to make.

 

I’d like to spin a tale for you.  One full of legalese, a few expenses, a bit of frustration, and a healthy dash of ignorance.  In short, a cautionary tale.

The upshot is that due to a trademark violation, I am changing the name of my team to Mega Monkey Motorsports™.  Back in February I got a phone call from a lawyer who informed me I was in violation of a trademark, but that the owner, who operates in California,  would like to meet me to work out a licensing agreement.  I was nervous, but I was going to California anyway, so Dad and I met the owner  and agreed to work out a licensing contract.   I came home thinking it would all work out.

The next week I spoke with the company and we discussed what the licensing agreement would entail.  I was not entirely satisfied with the agreement and I started doing a little research.  Big mistake.  My first stop was the US Patent and Trademark Office website.  I did a search for their trademark and there it was…and it said PENDING.  Further, it was pending in the category of Automobile Parts and Design…nothing to do with racing.  “HA!”  I thought.  They don’t even own the trademark!  I immediately registered myself as a Motorsports Team and wrote an email explaining my position to this company.  In my mind, the matter was done.

It was not.  I got an official cease and desist letter from the company.  I got an email copy of it the weekend of the Mint 400.  I saw it in my inbox and just couldn’t bring myself to open it.  I was already so stressed out with our first big race, and I knew if I opened it I would break down and I had to remain strong and positive for my team.  I let it lie until that Monday and I immediately dove into my rolodex.   I called my two lawyer friends.  I called people who I thought had lawyer friends.  Then I called those lawyers…anyone who I could get a grain of free advice from.  If you haven’t ever contacted a lawyer for a trademark violation case, a simple resolution will apparently cost upwards of $5ooo.oo.  Now that may not be a lot for a big company, but it’s a lot for me.  So I just grilled lawyer acquaintances until they begged me to stop.

I’d like to preface this next part by saying that if you find yourself in this situation,  my only advice  is to get advice.  As it turns out, trademark law is really complicated and the following applies only to my situation.  Okay?  Good.  There are a few ways a trademark can be established.  First, by common law.  This company had been using the trademark since the mid 1990s.  The fact that their official trademark was still pending didn’t really matter.  It’s the common law that trumps all.  The official trademark can only strengthen your case.  There is also the issue of confusion.  Would a consumer think that my racing activities were associated with this company?  Since this company was involved in auto and motorcycle design and custom fabrication, the answer from every lawyer I spoke with was yes.

I would like to go on the record that this entire process was nothing but professional on both sides.  This company is family owned and produces really cool custom vehicles for law enforcement, SWAT teams, and just for fun.  I was disappointed that we couldn’t come to a licensing agreement, but its called off road racing, not off road friends.  And so Mega Monkey Motorsports™ was born.

Why Mega Monkey Motorsports™?  Well, because Dirt Monkey Racing was taken!  I also toyed with Trademark Violation Racing, but when I ran it by some people that had no idea of the back story, they didn’t think it was funny.  (To me, it’s hilarious).  I paid $700 for a company to do a thorough common law, business name, internet, and trademark search.  Why not just do a google search and be done with it?  Well, a company could be out there that has no internet presence whatsoever.  Remember a google search will just turn up information that’s on the internet, and there are still plenty of folks out there who have no web presence.  Hence, $700 for a search company.  Then I paid the $500 or so for the official trademark, which is now pending.

So I am attempting to rid the internet of all evidence of THE TEAM WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED BY PENALTY OF LAW, although it’s difficult.  Google never forgets, but fortunately the company has acknowledged that.  I can only hope they start generating press of their own since  when you google “THE TEAM WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED BY PENALTY OF LAW“  I am the only thing that comes up for pages and pages (note:  not anymore.  this company has recently added a racing page to their website and it now shows up third in a google search, but then it’s all me again)  I also hope I can generate as much press as Mega Monkey Motorsports™ as I did before.  You can help by sharing this blog, tweeting about my name change, subscribing to my new YouTube channel and in general being the awesome fans that you are.  And remember, if there is one lesson to be learned from all of this it’s this:

Trademark yo’ shit.

www.youtube.com/megamonkeymotorsport
www.twitter.com/MMMotorsports
www.faceook.com/EmmeHall

 


Mint 400…Well More Like Mint 36

Oh those three little letters.  You know the ones:  D.  N.  F.  They stand for the most hated, vilified words in off road racing:  Did.  Not.  Finish.   But that is what we were.  Let me go back to the very beginning.  It’s a very good place to start, don’t you think?

I arrived in Las Vegas on Thursday morning.  Sammy Navarro, my partner for the race, picked me up at the airport and we were off like a shot!  Thursday was spent going up to main pits to grab our spot.  The good people at Best in the Desert had a pit reservation system in place and every place was marked out and numbered, which was really nice.  It helped mitigate people arguing over space and it was definitely less stressful to do it this way.  We also stickered up the car a bit, found a place to park (and with a truck and trailer in downtown Las Vegas its not always easy!), met up with some friends and just had a relaxing time.  The next day would be full of work…

We were up early to discuss driver rotation and to make work assignments.  We still needed to get the course on to the GPS, buy gas, talk to BFG pits, register, and of course, get the car through tech.  Sammy had brought Cortney on as another co-driver, so the three of us headed to registration, where we got SWAG!

Meanwhile, Dad was bringing the car around to the load off area so we could join the tech parade down Fremont Street.  We got our IRC tracker sorted out (small world, the ex-wife of a childhood friend now works for IRC…I was even in their wedding!) and then it was time to push the car down Fremont Street.

If you haven’t ever been to Fremont Street, its part of downtown Vegas that used to be super duper seedy.  The city turned it into a pedestrian zone, covered it with a canopy of lights, and revitalized the whole area.  And we got to take our cars down this open street!  People were all around taking pictures, asking about the cars, pointing at the cars…it was an attention whore’s dream!  But honestly it was going by so fast, if Dad hadn’t reminded us to take pictures, I would have totally forgotten!

We passed tech with flying colors, and I headed the line of cars following the police escort through the city streets to the on load area a few blocks away.  When a light turned green, I stalled the car.  Now before you start laughing I would like to remind you that I have very little time in this car and it has a racing puck clutch.  A puck clutch is either in or out.  It doesn’t slip like the kind of clutch you have in your street car.  So cut me some slack.

At any rate, I pressed the starter and nothing.  Again.  Nothing.  It would crank, but not turn over.  The guy behind me gave me a push and I dropped the clutch (oh by the way Mr. Police Officer who asked me if I knew how to do that..yes I do…jerk) and made it the on load area.  As soon as I got there I turned off the motor and turned it back on again with no problems, but it would come back to haunt us at the start line.

The rest of the day was spent on last minute work on the car and some team marketing.  I was able to get a great interview in with Speed Freaks and did an autograph session with one of my partners, Off Road Vixens.  Then driver’s meeting, and to bed early since we were up at 3am to get out to Jean and staging by 5am.  Yes.  5am staging for a 6am start time.  We decided that Sammy, having helped us out with entry fee and logistics, would take the first driver shift with me as co-dawg.  We lined up and as we were told to move to the start line, the damn car stalled.  And it wouldn’t start.  And it wouldn’t start.  And it wouldn’t start.

The other cars in our class started to go around us and she finally turned over.  We were racing already!  We got up to the side by side start and didnt really have time to think about anything before the light turned green and we were off.  In the dark.  And directly into silt.  What the hell?  Silt at the starting line?  Oh yeah.  So with 2 cars starting every 30 seconds in the silt that meant dust.  A lot of it.  We spent at least 50% of our race in the dust.  And I’m not talking a few specks here and there.  I’m talking can’t see 2 feet in front of you dust.  Most of the time we were just following the amber light of the car in front of us, watching it move up and down and adjusting our speed accordingly.

But there was so much for me to do as the co-driver that I didn’t really have time to be scared.  Co-driving is more than just going along for the ride.  You have to call corners, watch for danger signs, call mile markers back to pits, read the GPS, and most importantly, warn the driver of any cars coming up behind you.  It’s all easier said than done as you are strapped in so tightly you can’t really move, your helmet obscures your visibility, and you’re bouncing around like a ping pong ball in a wind tunnel.  I couldn’t get the GPS to track up, even though I had checked it before we left.  Instead of the cursor remaining still and the map moving below it, ensuring that a left on the GPS equaled a call of “left turn 100 feet,” the map stayed still and the cursor was moving.  So among all this I had to think, “Is this a left or right hand turn coming up?”  and that is a difficult thing to do while moving at 45 mph through rocks and silt.

We made it to pit 1 at race mile 36 and made the mandatory stop.  Sammy shifted into first and the tranny made the most horrible noise.  It sounded exactly like it did when we first picked up the car in February.  We had fixed the problem, we thought, with the new throwout bearing.  Not so, it seems.  We found our pits and we really only had a single truck there, as full pit crews are for teams that have, um, money.  Fortunately people out in the desert are always willing to help and as soon as we pulled in the car was surrounded.  In fact, at first we went ahead with the driver change as planned and as I settled into the seat there were suddenly 2 sets of hands helping me get my harness on, attaching my radio, and otherwise making sure I was safe to race.

Alas it was not to be.  We had some help from the Riot Racing guys and one guy who’s tshirt I don’t remember.  They pulled the motor and it seemed the input shaft was more moveable than it should have been, the clutch disc had seen better days, and the needle bearings were toast.  Now I don’t know if that was really the problem or if there is more to found inside the tranny itself.  I will say that we didn’t lose a gear and the noise was only heard with the clutch pushed in.  Could it be the pressure plate?  I’m not qualified to say.

We spent the rest of the day at pit 1 watching everyone come through and shooting the b.s. with everyone.  For dinner dad and I grabbed a buffet and were both asleep by 9pm, and I was in the air the next afternoon.  It’s frustrating to have spent all that time and money and then not even get to drive, but as they say…that’s racing.  The desert won this time, but I’ll win next time.  If we can get the car turned around in time I’d like to run the Mexican 1000 with NORRA.  It would give me some awesome seat time and its a really fun time as well.  Four days from Mexicali to Cabo!  It’s very expensive though and some unexpected bills have come up.  At any rate, that’s all for now.  Thanks for reading and I’ll see you in the dirt!


3am Wake Up Call

Just a quick update as I literally have to get up at before the ass crack of dawn to get to staging for the world famous Mint 400. Thank you so much to everyone who has wished me and Sammy well today. You can follow us LIVE tomorrow 3/24 at 6am PST at www.racetheworld.net We are car #1817 and we are racing for TeamTracie.org

 


How’d You Get That F*#^ing Awesome Job?

 

The 2012 Jeep Wrangler...and me.

I’ve had a few people email me in the past few weeks asking how I got started working for RoadflyTV.  (For those of you who know me only from racing, click on that link, then come back here.) In these economic times, where people do well in school, have amazing skills, get out and interview, send out resumes, and otherwise beat their heads against a wall and STILL find themselves out of work, I’m almost ashamed to say how I joined Roadfly.

I got lucky.

No joke.  Yes, I have always been into cars. My car of choice is a small, RWD convertible with a manual transmission (save for a brief dalliance with a little Honda del Sol in graduate school) and I’ve always driven off road in some kind of air cooled VW dune buggy or baja bug.

I had been off road racing with my dad for about a year when I met the Roadfly crew.   Jessi had just left to pursue her Ph.D full time and Roadfly was looking to replace her.  I distinctly remember telling Charlie (that’s the boss at Roadfly), “Look, I can’t replace Jessi.  She’s fantastic and people love her.  But I am a high energy personality.  I am funny and quirky and smart.  I’d love to work for you but don’t think I’m going to wear Jessi’s shoes, because they are not going to fit.”

Charlie agreed.  He wanted someone like me, but he understood that my style wouldn’t be for everyone, and I’ll admit I have my haters (I’m thinking of printing up t-shirts that say “I’m a Holla Hater” and if you don’t get that reference go here around 1:05).  But the people who don’t like me love the other host, Ross and those that don’t like the patented Ross Rapoport Style are,  in general, Emme Hall fans.

I was just in the right place at the right time.  But what about those of you who want to have a totally rad job like mine?

  • Network, network, network.  If you’re not on Twitter, get on it.  Follow all the car accounts, comment on them, hell Jalopnik posts about 100 things a day…send them a tip or an idea.
  • Start your own blog.  Write.  About anything related to cars.  You don’t need access to the press fleet to write about cars.  Check out my pal’s blog Cars Aren’t Scary.  He just writes about what moves him, automotive-wise.
  • Find out if any of your local car dealerships have YouTube channels and offer to do walk around reviews for them.
  • Go to the car shows.  Bring your video camera.  Talk to everyone.
  • Join SCCA.  You’ll meet a ton of people who love cars just like you.
  • Practice in front of the camera and review your tapes.  I realized that I have a tendency to talk too fast and that my excitement can come across as downright crazy unless I rein it in.
  • Be nice.  To everyone.  Offer to help when you can.  It will come back to you, I promise.
  • Did I mention network?  I have made countless connections over Twitter, one of which resulted in me getting seat time in their race car.

As with all things in life, you have to figure out what you want to do and then do it.  It sounds simple but of course it’s not.  So here’s another one:  Never, ever, ever, give up.  Ever.

 


Crunch Fitness Partners With Mega Monkey Motorsports™

Washington, D.C., March 1, 2012 – Mega Monkey Motorsports ™  is proud to announce their partnership with Crunch Fitness in Washington DC for the 2012 racing season.

Crunch Fitness will provide Emme Hall, the principle driver of the Mega Monkey Motorsports™ 2 seat 1600cc desert race car, with personal training sessions as she prepares for the upcoming season.

“Anyone who thinks race car drivers are not athletes have never tried to control a car moving at high speeds through rocks, ruts, and silt,” said Hall.  “I may not be able to hit a homerun, spike a volleyball, or make a free throw, but trust me, after a race I am beat.  I need flexibility to climb into the car from the top while wearing a firesuit, gloves, head and neck restraint, and helmet, upper body strength for car control and to get the spare tire off the back and changed quickly, and cardio stamina to keep my heart from racing at the starting line!”

 Bryan Bullock, General Manager of the downtown DC Crunch Fitness, is also excited about partnering with Hall Ass Racing.  “Emme is a fixture at the gym already.  I’m looking forward to working with her and seeing her grow in her fitness levels, and we know she will be a great brand ambassador for us.”

Bryan Bullock and Emme Hall

About Crunch Fitness

In twenty years, Crunch has grown from a tiny aerobics studio with no air conditioning into a collection of 27 state-of-the-art gyms in locations such as New York, Miami, Los Angeles, Portland, Orange County, Sacramento, San Diego, the San Francisco Bay Area, and Washington DC.  It stands as a rapidly growing brand that fuses fitness and entertainment to make working out fun, bringing a host of unique services and products to our active and expanding clientele. 

Their philosophy is simple, “There are no judgments here – No too much or not enough. No glares of disapproval. Here we keep open minds. We are nurturers. We seek only to encourage, empower and entertain. There is no one type. There is no one reason. There is no one way. What we are is a diverse community; what we have is a culture of fun; what there is, is room for everyone: all kinds of people with all kinds of goals who’ve chosen to come reach them with us.”  You can learn more at http://www.crunch.com and follow on Twitter @CrunchGym.

About Mega Monkey Motorsports™

Mega Monkey Motorsports™ includes driver Emme Hall and her father, Larry Hall, as well as a team of unpaid (but highly appreciated) mechanics, welders and wrenchers.  They campaign a 2 seat 1600cc air cooled VW race car in races in California, Nevada, and Mexico.  They have been featured in Dusty Times, Dirt Sports, S&S Off Road Magazine, and Gearbox Magazine, and Emme blogs for Female Racing News.  Last year she helped Desert Dingo earn the VORRA season championship in class 11 (stock VW bugs) and holds the record at the Buffalo Peak Hill Climb, co-driving for JT Taylor in an ultra-4.  Emme holds an MFA in Costume Technology in North Carolina School of the Arts and is also a graduate of Yale School of Drama.  She is the Costume Manager at Ford’s Theatre in Washington DC and reviews new cars for Roadfly TV.  During her few free weekends you can find Emme campaigning her stock 2001 Miata in SCCA autocross events.  She has been aptly described as a “charisma missle.”  To learn more visit http://www.megamonkeymotorsports.com and follow along on Twitter @MMMotorsports.


Mega Monkey Motorsports™ Partners with Dezert Outlaw Motorsports for Mint 400

Sammy and I at Parker 425

 Washington, D.C., February 23, 2012 – Mega Monkey Motorsports™  is proud to announce their partnership with Dezert Outlaw Motorsports and Team Tracie for this year’s Best in the Desert Mint 400, March 23-25.  The announcement was made on February 20th on The Down and Dirty Off Road Show, hosted by Jim Beaver.

Sammy Navarro of Dezert Outlaw Motorsports has created Team Tracie to raise money to fight colorectal cancer, which is diagnosed in over 130,000 people each year in the United States alone.  Team Tracie’s mission is to help spread the word of early detection in the fight against colorectal cancer. Early detection is very important and vital, for over 80% of all cases of colorectal cancer can be prevented with screenings and follow up appointments. March is Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month, and the team wants to pay tribute to Tracie and encourage her to stay strong.  Tracie, you are not alone and that she is not alone in this fight!

Mega Monkey Motorsports™  includes driver Emme Hall and her father, Larry Hall, as well as a team of unpaid (but highly appreciated) mechanics, welders and wrenchers.  They are happy to join forces with Team Tracie and race their new 2/1600 at the Mint.

“When Sammy told me about Tracie’s story I was only too happy to help.  Racing for Tracie in the Mint will be such an honor.  The fact that I get to share driving duties with such an awesome driver is just a bonus.”

Sammy is excited as well. “I can’t tell you how excited I am to be teaming up with such a wonderful person like Emme and her motley band of racers.  Through this partnership we will be able to spread the word about colorectal cancer and honor my friend, Tracie.  I would like to thank Emme for allowing me to bring along my team members Mike Jenkins and Cortney Mcrae and race with the TeamTracie.org and FightColorectalCancer.org names on the new 2/1600.  Together we are going to make a fantastic showing at the Mint 400”

The Mint 400 is one of the best known desert races in the United States.  The new 400-mile course is located in Jean, Nevada, and will feature a high-speed passing zone near a dedicated spectator area, as well as rocky washes, silt beds, high-speed graded roads, rock gardens, and the giant rolling jumps The Mint is famous for. Additionally, racers will start side-by-side (two at a time), making “turn one” a new exciting spectacle of the race.

About Dezert Outlaw Motorsports

Run With the Bull

Dezert Outlaw Motorsports has raced in many off road series such as SCORE, BITD, MDR, SNORE,  and the recent Lucas Oil Off Road Racing Series.  With teammates Jenkins and Mcrae, the team has had multiple wins and podium finishes.  Dezert Outlaw has been featured in magazines such as Dirt Sports, OFF-ROAD, Skinnie Magazine, Dusty Times as well as in the off road video games Baja: Edge of Control and TrophyLite Rally for Play Station 3 and XBOX 360.  Sammy loves being behind the wheel but also excels outside of the car.   When he is not promoting sponsors and racers on live radio, at off road expos, and at race contingencies, you can find him working public relations for Mike Jenkins Motorsports.  More information can be found at www.teamtracie.org and http://FightColorectalCancer.org   You can follow Sammy on Twitter @DezertOutlawSam

About Mega Monkey Motorsports™

Mega Monkey Motorsports™  campaigns a 2/1600 and has been featured in Dusty Times, Dirt Sports, S&S Off Road Magazine, and Gearbox Magazine.  Last year Emme helped Desert Dingo earn the VORRA season championship in class 11, and holds the record at the Buffalo Peak Hill Climb, co-driving for JT Taylor.  Although sidelined for a year due to health reasons of her navigator, Michele Martineau,  Emme is currently working towards running with the Gazelles in the 2013 Rallye Aicha des Gazelles, a 9 day all female rally through the deserts of Morocco…no GPS allowed.   Emme holds an MFA in Costume Technology in North Carolina School of the Arts and is also a graduate of Yale School of Drama.  She is the Costume Manager at Ford’s Theatre in Washington DC and reviews new cars for Roadfly TV.  During her few free weekends you can find Emme campaigning her stock 2001 Miata in SCCA autocross events.  She has been aptly described as a “charisma missile.”  To learn more visit http://www.megamonkeymotorsports.com, and follow on Twitter @MMMotorsports.

 


It’s….A New Car (and some other stuff at Parker)

At one point during this weekend I said to my dad, “What day is it?” To which he replied, “Saturday.”  To which I asked, “Day or night?”  It was just that kind of weekend.  In three days we drove LA-Barstow-Parker-Parker Strip-Parker-Anaheim-Venice Beach-Barstow-Hacienda Heights-LA-red eye to DC.

I left DC late Thursday afternoon on a ticket I had earned by refashioning a pal’s pink gorilla suit to get it ready for her boyfriend for Mardi Gras (I swear I can’t make this stuff up). At LAX I picked up the 2012 Audi A5, with a manual transmission thank you baby Jesus, to review for Roadfly. From there I drove up to Victorville and met Dad. Early the next morning we were off to tech for Parker 425.

Sweet Looking Audi A5

Now before you get all excited, this is not a race report. The trip to Parker was merely to See and Be Seen.  I met up with, Michele, my navigator for the Rallye Aicha des Gazelles in Morocco.  For those of you not in the know, this year we were planning on running the Gazelle rally, a 9 day adventure similar to Dakar except it’s all female, points are awarded for shortest distance not fastest time, and no GPS is allowed. All navigation is done with an outdated map and a compass. Unfortunately Michele needs to have some surgery so our plans are on hold.  You can read the whole story at www.teamcouragegazlles.com  But we wanted to make it out to Parker to show the off road community that we are still determined to run with the Gazelles.

Team Courage Gazelles...Delayed but Not Gone

So we worked tech.  I mean we WORKED it!  We talked to the Fast Aid  guys, we joked around with the Dirt Sports Magazine dudes, we chilled with Azunia Tequila, shot the bs with the guys from Major Performance Engines, checked in with PCI race radios…hell we even discussed how Dakar could be promoted better in North America with Darren Skilton. But enough of the shameless name dropping. Let’s just say we had a great time. For my twitter followers, I tried to get some pics out but the network was so crowded it was impossible.

Team Courage Gazelles with Darren Skilton

We spent the night north of Parker at some old time race guy’s house and I remember something about a jacuzzi and my dad acting like a turtle on his back and that’s really all you need to know about Friday night.

The next day we had to get to Anaheim by 3pm to meet with a potential partner,  but we knew we HAD to watch some of the race.  There was an awesome spot where the cars would go under highway 95, race the largest part of the loop, then come back under 95. You caught them coming and going. So there we were, just chilling and we hear, “Oh man the Hall Ass Racing truck is here?  Hide your beer, everyone!” It was Randy, Carol, and Guy, some old neighbors from San Felipe. What a small, small, world.

If you haven’t watched an off road race before, its a little different than a pavement race.  Spectators are required to stay off the course, but there are still no barriers between you and the cars. This means that it can be quite dangerous, as evidenced by the California 200 tragedy a few years ago.  However, Best in the Desert did a great job keeping everyone safe.  The safety guy in our area made sure everyone was a safe distance from the course, and when this bozo couple tried to cross from one side to the other he was ON them like stink on poop.  They returned to their place much maligned, as they should have been.  A hot course is a hot course, and just because you can hear these guys and see their dust before they get to you, doesn’t give you, as a spectator, carte blanche to just walk across the lines.

Alas we couldn’t stay long as we had to get to Anaheim.  I don’t want to say too much about it as we are still negotiating, but a few weeks ago I got a call from a speciality fabrication company who expressed interest in partnering with us.  It’s a family owned company and dad and I had a blast meeting everyone. We were even their guests at the Supercross that night. Expect a fairly big announcement soon, but for now all I will say is that we are looking forward to hammering out the details.

After a quick sleep in Anaheim it was off to Venice to pick up the new race car.  Now let me start off my saying that this whole weekend was an exercise in herding cats.  I had to make sure we met up with Michele at the designated time, then she and I split off from dad at tech so we had to coordinate meeting times, figure out where we would sleep that night.  Getting dad out the door on Saturday morning was a bit of a chore (his goodbyes tend to be a little long), then we had to separate ourselves from the Old Gang at the race and make it to Anaheim on time, and find a place to crash that night.

So the final hurdle was getting the car up to Barstow for a little testing.  Skiny, who raced the car in the Baja 1000 as part of his Gentlemen’s Guide to Racing series, had it in storage in Venice Beach, but he had to go out to Vegas that Friday.  It was ridiculous to think he could drive from Vegas to LA, pick up the car, then bring it back to Barstow, so we did what Gentlepeople of Racing do:  Skiny called his girlfriend, she gave us the keys and the title, we hitched the car up to the truck  and brought her up to Barstow.  Now, we had met Skiny before, but  I don’t know a lot of people that would trust 2 people to basically steal his car and bring it to an appointed place in the middle of the desert.  But trust us he did and when Skiny came up behind us about a mile away from the Slash X, we knew it was cosmic fate.

She's still got some mud on her from the Baja 1000, but I think she's awful purdy.

The throwout bearing is bad in the car, so when Skiny took off with me as co-dawg, she made an awful, awful noise!  But once she started there was no stopping!  With the longer wheel base she handles the whoops SO much better than our 5 unlimited.  It’s not necessarily more powerful, but she could definitely run through the whoops better.  There’s no speedometer in the car, but on the flat I’d say we were up to 70 mph or so…and this is with a motor that hasn’t been prepped since the 1000.  Major Performance built the engine originally and they know the car well.  They said the car SMOKED all the other 1600s in Vegas to Reno a few years ago.  Same engine as we have now.  That’s not to say that I’ll do the same thing, of course.  Getting the most out of this car is going to be a challenge.  I’ll have to change my mind set to realize that whoops may or may not mean “slow down”.

I took a little bit of video while we were out there.  I need to do just a bit of editing, but I was on that red eye last night. Even though my pal upgraded me to first class on the way home, I probably only slept two hours.  Just rolled right from the airport to work.  So video will happen tomorrow, probably.  The entire photo album is up on my Facebook page for your enjoyment.  But for now, this is Mega Monkey Motorsports™, off to find my bed after a whirlwind weekend of dirty fun!